To get what you want, try saying nothing, or in the words of the Glaser's book title, Be Quiet, Be Heard, The Paradox of Persuasion. This is a great thought piece for all of us - but especially the humble and introverts who think they have to change to be effective. In a recent evaluation of coaching we completed, listening and asking good questions were perceived as having the biggest impact on people achieving their objectives. “A well-deployed silence can radiate confidence and connection. The trouble is, so many of us are awful at it.” So writes Rachel Feintzeig in the Wall Street Journal, and we couldn't agree more. Most of us rush in to fill any void in a conversation, but remaining still can reap untold benefits. Strategic silence can help in negotiations and selling. Instead of countering every point, try embracing a pause and soon you may find your counterpart jumping in with valuable information that will help you understand their needs and close. Sometimes holding your tongue can feel like going against biology. Humans are social animals, says Robert N. Kraft, professor emeritus of cognitive psychology at Ohio’s Otterbein University. “Our method of connecting— and we crave it — is talking.” For years, Kraft assigned his students a day without words, and many students also found that when forced to stop talking, they bonded better with their peers. Without pauses, we’re generally worse speakers, going off on tangents, stumbling over sounds, offering TMI (too much information), and maybe saying things we later regret. We can also put undue stress on ourselves, as talking to excess can raise our blood pressure, adrenaline and cortisol. So, the next time you are unsure of what to say, try saying nothing at all. https://www.theglasers.com/communication-capsule-blog/silence-the-secret-weapon
The number of emails sent daily has increased 34 percent since 2017. When you are on planned time off (PTO), you might welcome relief from all these messages. But does your Out of Office reply make promises you shouldn’t have to keep—like, “I will get back to you as soon as I return”? Making good on this pledge might require superhuman powers, not to mention being a waste of your valuable post vacation time. Writing in the Wall Street Journal, reporter Elizabeth Bernstein found some great examples of a more creative approach:
“I think people are more lonely because they are less adept at being in relationships as that involves conflict, friction and differences,” she says. “An enormous amount of people are cutting off friends and family members like never before.”
Perel believes young Americans’ emphasis on being their most authentic selves comes at the expense of forming connections. In reality, you learn a lot about yourself through friendships, partnerships, and generally relating to other people.
Great article showing the health benefits of self-forgiveness. People who forgive themselves for past mistakes tend to experience better mental and physical health. Apologizing helps initiate self-forgiveness, but even without an apology, the act of self-compassion can reduce negative emotions like shame and guilt. This reduction in emotional distress contributes to better mental well-being, which in turn promotes physical health, such as improved sleep and reduced fatigue. For the full article, visit Greater Good Science Centre
Great article discussing how group-based play at work can foster psychological safety in diverse teams, encouraging employees to take more risks without fear of judgment. Playful activities help break down exclusionary dynamics, making individuals feel more connected and less focused on self-protection. The study highlights how these playful interactions create a sense of collective vulnerability, helping diverse team members engage more freely with one another. Organizations are encouraged to incorporate regular group-play sessions to enhance trust, risk-taking, and collaboration among employees. You can read the full article here.
